Posted: August 1, 2014 in Bipolar, Health, Life, Love, mental health, women

July 27th was my birthday and no, I will not say my age. I’m middle-aged and that’s all I’ll divulge. Am I vain? Yes. Absolutely.

I had a lovely birthday complete with gifts, well wishes, yummy food and affection. I was taken care of by all who love me.

The aftermath is always strange and fuzzy. I’m in an awkward state for a few days. Then I do my life assessment – accomplishments and failures. This is dangerous, but I do it anyway.

When will it all end? Bipolar is forever. Hysterectomy – am I really a woman? Knee replacement surgery is forthcoming. Until then pain and fear is a staple in every step I take.

On the flip side, I have gone on amazing trips with my lovely husband. I can speak Spanish. I have two blogs. And I have a lot of good people who love me.

Why do I do this to myself? Maybe I want to lob my own stones at my own house. I’ve been doing this all my life. Judging myself is the place where I hide.

I don’t hide all the time, but birthdays are a trigger. I think reaching physical and mental balance is like scaling Mt. Everest. Sadly, I don’t want a Sherpa.


  1. shabeeha says:

    Introspection is the best therapy.


  2. Doris says:

    Happy birthday!! the reason I have a facebook is for not forgetting my friends b-days,but I get on once in a while so I do not see it :(.

    I do not tell my age too, people make all this assumptions, and it gives them the right to say all kinds of crap. I do not know why we do this when our birthdays are coming up or after, I do it too, maybe is our fears, that we have to reach certain goals of somethings. But , I am glad you got to see all the good in your life. When are you going into surgery? o

    Muchas Felicidades! Que cumplas muchos más!

    Liked by 1 person

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