Mortify

Posted: December 17, 2013 in America, Life, Society
Tags: , , , ,

I love being the preachy blogger that apologizes (in a sanctimonious way) for being preachy. It’s all bullshit because I’m not really sorry for being who I am. I choose to express myself this way.

I like the idea of making suggestions (arrogantly) on how to behave, communicate and appreciate humanity. I never talk about my own shortcomings. If I did, I would be mortified. Mortify – here I come.

I was out of my house today for 5 to 6 hours. I was driving with eternal honkers and non-signaling lane changers. How did deal with this road hostility? I honked, flashed my high beams, yelled, cursed and honked some more. I was a bitch.

First, I  mailed off Christmas cards at the post office. Then I made my way to the mall. Mercifully, I easily found a parking spot.

At the mall, I was greeted by a young salesperson, in a hip and trendy store, who helped me shop for my 13 year-old niece. The staff at the bookstore helped me immediately and were super sweet, even though they were slammed with customers. I realize salespeople were doing their jobs, but I really appreciated it.

Afterwards, I found myself incapable of shopping, thinking or even walking. I stumbled into a coffee-house. I ordered a mocha and asked if they could bring it to me because I was in so much pain (my knees and feet).

My drink was brought to me by a customer! She said I looked like I needed help. I said, God bless you! I sat there for 30 minutes to fortify myself mentally for the traffic-infested drive home.

When I got to my car, I sat in it for a few minutes before starting the engine. I felt a tsunami of shame hit me. Here it is, Christmas season and I’m getting pissed over petty shit. I mentally apologized to those I wronged.

The drive home was a long but peaceful one. Those that were friendly and kind to me didn’t have to be. I don’t deserve their kindness, but I’m grateful. And I will try to live up to my sermons, although I am not Santa Monica!

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Comments
  1. Hehe. Nice piece. I am sure you deserve being treated nicely! Happy holidays!

    Like

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